An Accidental Mini Manifesto for Children
This is Cadence "teaching" our friend Matt Joynt how to play Pat-a-cake in the midst of Mess Hall's 5th anniversary party on Sunday night. I love that kids can ALWAYS take the time to play in the midst of anything and everything. Matt is one of those people who have been extremely generous with his time and understanding of Cadence and her energetic ways, so this photo means a lot to me.
One of the reasons I try to include Cadence in as many "grown-up" events as possible is that I think it's important for people who normally don't come in contact with children to do so at least once in a while. I think we as a society exclude children from much of our lives because we don't have much tolerance for behavior that inconveniences us in any way. And yet we put up with grown-ups who may get a little too drunk or who cheat on their partners or who exploit/debase women or who step on as many heads as possible in climbing that corporate ladder because they "have a right" to be there, wherever "there" may be, while we groan and grumble when we're seated next to the table with small children (I admit it--I've done this myself).
I don't believe that children should be seen and not heard. We are a generation of children who were raised based on that assumption, and look where it's taken us. The hurt in our collective heart is so deep that it brings tears to my eyes to write this, and seriously, I started out just posting a sweet photo of my friend with my daughter. I have no idea how I ended up here...
I believe that children should be seen AND heard. I believe that children should be played with. I believe children should be respected for doing the best they can with what they have.
So bring out your children, let them be seen in public, and do not apologize, for they have a right to be among us. Do not silence your children, give them a voice, and you may be surprised at the insights they share. Let your children play and have fun, and play with them. Play, play play. We have no idea how much we are missing out by choosing work over play. Give your children the dignity they deserve as a part of humanity, and respect their feelings even if they are expressed in a way that embarrasses or inconveniences you. Do all this, encourage other parents and grownups to do this, and let's see how the world will change.
And I write all this for myself, because I so need to hear and heed these words...
9 Comments
Reader Comments (9)
We are the children
of yesterday
Who play the games
of today
Who soon will be
the children of tomorrow
unable to play.
Really great thoughts - something I would have written myself. My husband and I don't have a huge social life, since we recently moved to a new area, but our Piper is a part of us, and leaving her behind because people get annoyed or offended or inconvenienced is really tough. I get so mad! She's got a right to live too! Your Cadence is so cute! Wish we could meet her!
Great post! Thanks for writing it and reminding me. Seems I often worry too much about what others think and I need to stop that.
You are absolutely right! Thanks for bringing light to this subject.
Often times, I find myself thinking that it will be too much of a hassle to do this or that with my daughter, who can babysit? Now, I've learned to embrace her smile and presence in different situations.
I love the soft tones to this image!
wonderfully stated. and a great reminder.
hope you do not mind if i link to your post.
Ironic that you post this. I was just talking today to a woman who I was telling about how Cunksi comes with me everywhere. My thought on it is, they (adults) can deal with it. In my culture, children were always in society, I'm doing my part to bring that back. I'm a parent, I have a child, she is a part of my life. She has been involved in everything I've done since she was born. She behaves very well in public... because she's been allowed to be in public. If you put them in the situation, they will learn. I always get comments on how well behaved she is. So even though they may roll their eyes when they see me walk in with her, they all love and coo over here by the time it's all over. (she's 17 months now.) Smallish children can teach adults the biggest lessons.
Thanks for posting this by the way!! I always love reading your posts. Cadence is beautiful.
Amen sister. You express perfectly what is in my heart too.
Your words are so true and needed to be voiced! Thanks for this reminder to celebrate our children and childhood in general.